Juice of the Devil, commonly known as Coffee, is apparently good for you, or is it?

Juice of the Devil, commonly known as Coffee, is apparently good for you, or is it?

Juice of the Devil, commonly known as Coffee, is apparently good for you, or is it?

There are basically two types of people in this world, (get prepared for unnecessary hyperbole ladies and gentlemen), the ones who are addicted to caffeine and the ones who still haven’t given in to the devil just yet. There’s one more category though, people who drink decaffeinated green tea. This category will thrive until the regulations on gun laws aren’t relaxed a bit i.e. shoot a hipster on sight. Going by popular consensus I’m going to assume you belong to the former. Apologies for the over dramatic intro but it’s partly due to the lack of caffeine navigating through my veins hitting me point blank in the head thereby enabling the left side of the brain, which apparently had a little too much lukewarm kingfisher yesterday, to work in accordance with the central nervous system.

A new study from the Journal of Applied Psychology, a journal published by the American psychological association, says employees are better able to deal with situations of debilitating social anxiety while they are under the influence of caffeine. In a related study, also conducted by the American Psychological Association, they have found that a slave’s work rate increases 10x folds when hit on the back with a blunt whip.

According to the study, when people get tired, their ability to maintain control over themselves diminishes (genius!) and without the mental resources necessary to regulate their behavior, people may have a greater tendency to break the rules at work, an excuse I presume Hitler would have used.

This latest study examined the effects of sleep deprivation and caffeine intake on 229 college students, many of whom were paid to stay up all night (I’ll be right back, got a bridge to sell). A group of those sleep-deprived students were then given caffeine-laced gum that would provide roundabout the same boost as a cup of coffee, while others chewed regular gum. Just to make this entire experiment seem a tad bit more excruciating and reality-tv like the participants were given an option to lie to another person in order to earn more money while performing basic lab tasks. The money earned by lying will come directly at the expense of the other person’s payout. The conclusion to this highly crucial and significant (All that sarcasm just dripped all over my keyboard) study was that the students who hadn’t slept the night before the experiment were more likely to lie, at the urging of the experimenter, than those who got a full night’s rest. The experimenters would encourage the participants to lie to each other on a regular basis. However, this effect was moderated in the caffeine group, students in this particular group were less likely to get influenced by the experimenters and lie to their fellow participant.

So, what’s your take on this study? The experiment, conducted on less people than you witness in a regular Mumbai taxi, does make you doubt the authenticity of the claims made by the journalists. I’m usually very cynical when it comes to studies of this variety, with all the unpredictable human nature and stuff. So whats your opinion? Have you ever imagined a life devoid of coffee?

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Delhi guy, I live by the saying '"Sir, salary de do".

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